"Why Lesbians Marry" (Jet Magazine, January 1, 1953)

The following article appeared in JET Magazine on January 1, 1953

WHY LESBIANS MARRY

While lecturing in New York City on the causes of sex perversion, a Negro psychiatrist touched very perfunctorily on the advantages which homosexuals can find in marriage. A few days later, he received 11 letters, four of them from admittedly lesbian Negro women, asking for the names of men who would be willing to marry them. The letters were remarkably frank. The writers spoke freely of their sex tendencies, interests, ages, educations, occupations, ambitions. While they differed from each other on many points, the lesbians shared a common desire to find husbands - oddly enough, the more masculine, the better.

Their letters did not come as a shock to the psychiatrist, who had counseled many sex deviates during his career. Nor were their reasons for wishing to marry unfamiliar. Psychiatrists who have dealt with the problems of homosexuals find that while each must be handled as an individual, distinct case, broad conclusions can be reached about eh ability of some to adjust to marriage.

Obviously feminine men who flaunt their lack of masculinity by dressing and conducting themselves like women usually hold such an aversion for real women that marriage would appear to be a farce to them.  The same holds true for masculine women, to whom the idea of living with a man is revolting. But these "obvious' types only make up a small part of the homosexual population, counselors say.  They have found a large number of women and men who are homosexual, yet able to tolerate the opposite sex.  These people are really considered "bisexual," capable of interest in both men and women.  And these are the persons who often find that marriage is both satisfying and useful to them.

Typical is the case of the wife of the prominent Negro businessman in the South. She is known among her associates as a lesbian and often flaunts her beliefs openly in her crowd.  But to all appearances she maintains a happy home with her husband, despite her occasional lapses on her own side of hte sex line.

Although there are believed to be fewer lesbians than homosexual men, doctors who have studied female deviates say it is far easier for this group to marry than for male perverts to do so.  The woman's sexual role demands merely that she is compliant, but a man has to be capable of being aroused if he is to play his part.  Some lesbians have succeeded in hiding their perverted tendencies from men until they have married them - and sometimes for even longer.  Many become "good" wives, both in their husband's opinion and the public's.  Behind their determination is an appreciation for the "ad-

Psychiatrists Help Some Make Adjustments
vantages" which the New York doctor mentioned in his lecture: the personal companionship, security and protection from social hostility which they cannot find in any other relationship.

Frequently, lesbians seek psychiatric help to enable them to adjust to marriage.  Although there may always be some degree of bisexuality in their make-up, psychiatrists declare that it is possible in many areas to free the heterosexual elements in their characters and equip them to assume their normal role in life.  this is especially true of a woman to whom lesbianism is but a search for some new thrill.  These women often find deviation not as exciting as imagined nd return to normal sex relations.  Such a case is the wife of a Negro boxer, whose own philandering adventures drover her to thrill-seeking.  But she was caught with her female companion when her husband's suspicions were aroused.

Surprisingly, few lesbians wan to marry homosexual husbands, because by doing so they would destroy the very goal which they strive toward in marriage.  Such a union would offer them no "front," and little chance to acquire the self-confidence they desire.  Although the idea of bearing children is frightening to the majority of lesbians, there are some who try to adopt youngsters and are quite willing to rear them and love them in a throughly normal and maternal way.

Other lesbians enter marriage with the groundless hope that in it they will find escape from their aberration.  Counselors observe that these marriages rarely last, because when the lesbian discovers her mistake, her hostility towards her husband increases to the point where marriage is impossible.  There are cases on record in which lesbians have deserted their husbands, taken their children and moved back into their former girl friend's homes, there to live in apparent happiness ever after. 

Several cases have reached the courts in which husbands with lesbian wives sued women who "stole" their wives' affections.  Most recent case involved a Negro husband, who lived happily with his wife for 40 years and then lost her to another woman.  He filed a "love balm" suit.

Most deviants try hard to make a success of marriage, however, because they find it to be a bugger against loneliness and an assurance that at least one person can be depended upon to offer them companionship day after day and year after year.  not all of these women give up their lives of promiscuity, although some do.  Those who continue in it generally live in two worlds, one normal and one abnormal, with the silent prayer that never shall the twain meet.  Even though their adjustment to marriage may never be complete, it is an anchor and a bulwark, an institution which has its rewards for those masculine women who can assume its responsibilities.

Next Week in JET:

Why Musicians Choose White Wives
Ever since the roaring 20's when Negro jazz and its birth int he entertainment world, Negro musicians have continually found that their music has often led to romance.  In recent years, many top-flight Negro jazzmen have crossed the color line in increasing numbers to marry white brides.  Just why they do is told in a frank article in next week's JET.

The Seven Negro Wonders of the World
From ancient times to the present, people have marveled at the world's unique creations, both man-made and natural.  As "wonders" of civilization, however, few of them hnaev ever been identified with the Negro genius that went into their making.  JET, next week, in an illustrated feature, spotlights seven of these "wonders" attributed to Negroes and tells the little known story behind their creations.